Communication is our lifeline to humanity.

Some years back, I wrote an article about using dehumanizing language when talking to or about people with whom we disagree. I had just read one of Brene’ Brown’s books (can’t recall which one) and she spent a great deal of time discussing the catastrophic effects of dehumanizing others. Every person in this world shares the same basic human experience. We are born, experience emotion and ultimately die. When we have significant differences of opinions with people, it’s easy to forget we share the same human experience. When we forget this, it is easy to dehumanize others. In my article, I cautioned people, and myself to stop with the dehumanize language because removing the human element from someone leads to atrocities beyond our comprehension.

Fast forward about 5 years and we have moved beyond dehumanizing and stopped talking to people we disagree with entirely. In some instances going so far as to forcibly silence others because we don’t like what they have to say. I personally have experienced this, with the threat of my husband’s career if I did not stop talking about things our local hospital did not like. (More on that later, as it is worthy of its’ own post and podcast.)

It’s overwhelming to think how we got here and also how in the world we solve this issue. As with everything in life, we have to start with our own self. We have to talk to others, in the flesh not online. We have to have uncomfortable or undesirable conversations with loved ones, coworkers, and friends. We have to start sitting down, face to face and communicating. No more taking the easy route of texting or even picking up the phone. We need to sit face to face, look into another persons eyes and realize no matter our differences, we are both human and ultimately share the same human experience. The person across from you, no matter the events of their lives, will die just like you will. That person deserves to be treated humanly, just like you do. I’m the first to admit, this is hard because I enjoy slinging political mud just as much as the next guy;)

But we have to start communicating again. You can start this today by talking to those around you. My husband and I took a long walk this weekend to discuss a situation in which we have been deeply at odds. We respectfully heard one another out, challenged one another’s way of thinking, and helped each other see another point of view. We came to some agreement but not entirely and that’s ok. At least we had the difficult conversation instead of shutting one another out and allowing resentment to build.

I posted a poll on social media asking people their beliefs about spirits, religion and God and I was inundated with personal stories from people who were willing to share. It encouraged me. It made me realize just how much people miss talking about things that matter to them. Here were people, most of whom I’ve never met, sending me paragraphs of experiences and beliefs around God. Wow! There is hope that people are craving connection and meaningful communication.

We have been shutting people out long enough. Add lockdowns and absolute political polarity and we have a recipe for dehumanization like that of the 20th century which led to the death of hundreds of millions of people. We can all agree we don’t want to repeat that!

Start with those around you, then start talking to others. Learn something about someone every single day. Pay someone a genuine compliment. Most importantly, get off the internet and into the real world; that is where real problems are solved.